One thing that is always surprising about massage is how hard it is for people to make the time and allow themselves to be taken care of. I understand financial difficulties, but it's clear to me that money is not the obstacle for many people.

Case in point: gift certificates.

Some people call right away, and make use of their gift certificate within a week or two. Most schedule a massage within a few months, depending on their often busy schedules. And a handful of people I don't hear from for six months, a year, or ever.

While plenty of people have said that this is just a lucky situation for me - making money without really working - it always makes me sort of sad. When I sell someone a gift certificate, they have found me and decided that my work would be a special gift. I have all intention of making their gift a special one - I think of us as co-conspirators in making their loved one feel good. So when they don't appear, I feel a little like I've promised to do something and not followed through.

I don't usually take it personally - I know that people get busy and lose track of things and sometimes just have their own reasons for not wanting to be massaged. I trust that they will make it in when and if they are supposed to.

It did become an issue when I started planning to move to a new area, however. I moved my home in August, but continued to do massage in Bellingham until the end of 2008. So last spring I went through my gift certificate log and contacted everyone I'd sold an unredeemed gift certificate to, to let them know that I'd be leaving the area, and that they might want to nudge the recipient.

Some of these people had purchased the session years ago, but I contacted them all because my conscience was going to poke at me relentlessly otherwise. Sidenote: since 2004 my conscience has had backup - in Washington State it is illegal to put an expiration date on any gift certificate or gift card that has been paid for with money. (Donations are different.)

So, while I'm not taking it personally, and you can technically wait as long as you want (assuming the business still exists) to cash in your gift certificate - why wait? If it feels selfish to lie on a table and do nothing while someone else works to make your feel better, think of how much easier it is to be kind to other people, to focus, to stay healthy, and to appreciate the world around you when you are feeling more relaxed. I think that you might actually be doing us massage therapists and everyone around you a favor.